It’s one thing to accept your circumstances. It’s another to accept other people as they are. For some creative people — and perfectionists in particular — self-acceptance is challenging indeed.
Are you too hard on yourself? Do you tend to beat yourself up for perceived mistakes or shortcomings? Do you view yourself negatively or harshly? If so, you’re hurting yourself unnecessarily. The first step towards interrupting these unhealthy, unhelpful patterns is to learn self-acceptance. To the extent you can learn to accept yourself exactly as you are, the happier, healthier and more creative you’ll be.
It breaks my heart when my coaching clients are overly harsh with themselves. These are smart, creative people with sky-high standards…and man can they be mean with themselves. They treat themselves far worse than they would treat other people. If you’re like that — if you find that you’re less than delighted with yourself — then clear some time to work through today’s mini acceptance workshop, adapted from my co-authored book Happiness Awaits You.
Activity: Accepting yourself.
What is there about you that you wish was different? What do you like least about you?
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Activity: Of those items you just listed, cross off the things you have the power to change.
Now: consider only those items remaining. If you can’t change it, you must accept it…or you’ll be making yourself miserable. So let’s focus on that.
What is the impact on you to not accept these unchangeable items? How does it affect you?
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Now, look at each item and consider what might be the upside. (For example, if ‘I’m getting older’ is on your list, some upsides might be ‘I’m wiser than I’ve ever been, I’ve got a more informed perspective, I’ve got rich experiences from which to draw, I’ve collected more valued relationships, etc.’)
What are the upsides of the unchangeable items on your list?
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What would be the benefits to you if you accepted these things about yourself?
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Activity: Accept these things you cannot change.
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Are you struggling with too many talents, skills, ideas? You may have The DaVinci Dilemma™! Find tools, fun quizzes, coaching, inspiration and solutions for multi-talented people at http://www.davincidilemma.com/ .
